The kids are back in school now – at least the ones who're mobile – so it seems fitting to tackle multiple topics today before heading out to recess.

• How the hell did Elliot Spitzer get back in the news? I thought this confused, hypocritical crusader screwed himself out of the public eye already, but then CNN gave him (and Kathleen Parker) a talk show that oozed as much insight and chemistry as the Benefits Selling staff on a Monday morning. But, no, he has to bring up old stuff, running his misguided mouth about already-settled legal issues in a Slate column slamming Marsh and McLennan Cos., slinging accustations such as "price-fixing, bid-rigging and kickbacks." So, of course, they're suing (I would, too). And he gets his name back in the news. I'm thinking detention.

• This week's second dose of bad news (we've long since stopped counting the free-falling stock market around here) comes from the Social Security disability fund. The Associated Press reports new applications are up more than 50 percent over a decade ago, bleeding the fund dry at a much higher than expected clip. In fact, the experts now predict it will dry up by 2017. And while it makes the general Social Security fund look like Fort Knox by comparison, expect the "budget-conscious" lawmakers to rob that fund (Peter) to shore up the disability fund (Paul). Looks like we'll all be losing our lunch money.